Talking with My Teens about the Birds and the Bees

It’s time to have the talk. The birds and bees talk, with my teenage sons. I’ve actually put it off too long. It’s just hard to do, awkward you know?

But the time has come, things could get even more awkward. I’m going to have to sit them down.

And tell them.

Hubby and I need more time for sex.

When they were little and went to bed by 8:30, life was grand! Plenty of time for adult fun. But now, they stay up really late! Way later than we can stay awake. And they come home in the middle of the night. Being the good boys that they are, they always come in our room to tell us they are home.

So, it’s only a matter of time until we have an incredibly awkward moment. I mean, we all know our parents did it, at least once. Or, in my case, FOUR times! But really, no one wants to know they ever did it for anything but procreation. Definitely not recreation. They don’t want to know and frankly, I don’t want them to interrupt! This leads to a real challenge.

How do we set aside time for a healthy sex life without telling them, “Hey, don’t bother us for the next hour (ok, 10 minutes). And maybe you want to turn the TV up for a bit.”

I think just saying that, would put a damper on everyone’s evening.

We have a lock on the door. But really, “Hey, what’s the door locked for? Oh wait…eewww NO!”

And again, a damper on everyone’s evening.

Maybe we could do the old sock on the doorknob thing. But then they would know, and they don’t want to know!

So, its time to have a talk that no one wants to have. After 22 years of marriage, we still like each other. Sex is part of a healthy relationship, and frankly we enjoy it. Maybe when they have been married 20 years, they will understand why Mom and Dad forced them into that awkward conversation.

Or maybe, I’ll just send them a link to my blog and see if they suddenly make themselves scarce from oh, maybe 9-10 pm a few nights a week and get in the habit of texting me when they are headed home:).



Filed under Family, Lifestyle, Parenting, Randomness

10 responses to “Talking with My Teens about the Birds and the Bees

  1. Letha Markwardt

    I can’t believe that my daughter is doing such ……..hehe

  2. Laurie

    My foster mom still likes to make things awkward for us kids after 40+ years they just flat out tell us to go away, granted it is the same day that we are packing to leave home after a visit but she still tells us to pack faster ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. Try having them all gone for a few months and then filter back home for awhile…. I love having them home, but am sooo ready to have our empty nest back again!! Wishing you luck in finding the balance… We’re struggling too! ๐Ÿ˜‰

  4. This is hilarious. My kids are still young and for the most part, they are in bed by 9:30 (now, these days they are up by 6 – but that is another sad story). So, I am not in your position. I am more anxious about having the talk to explain the birds and bees.
    Anyway, I can not imagine how awkward that could be. It’s a shame you can’t record that conversation – the squirming would be worth the price of admission.

  5. Love this…and I totally get it. Anna is home for the summer…. ๐Ÿ™‚

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